I hate men: a case of Helleborus

A twenty-one-year-old girl came to me four years ago with hyperthyroidism. For the first year, she receives Sepia, Ignatia, Capsicum, Carbo animalis and Natrium muriaticum without much change. I did a retake of the case.

Chief complaints

Hyperthyroidism since three years.

She is on hormonal treatment without any change in her thyroid levels.  

Recurrent typhoid since childhood.

One strange complaint is that she develops severe colic if she consumes food prepared by her mother. She has no such issues with food prepared by anyone else, so she has a separate kitchen in their house.

She is not attached with anyone in her family ever since childhood.

Migraine since many years, bursting pricking pain, aggravated in sun.

All problems started after they shifted to their new home. She is not attached to her father; she hates him. She still dreams about her old house. She is very religious. She says she hates physical relations and hence does not wish to marry.

Observation: speech is slow and very childish.

Yogesh Malhotra (YM): Tell me about yourself, your problems, your life, how do you see the world, how do you see your disease?

Patient (P): “I feel very angry, the slightest things irritate me and annoy me. I can’t bear loud voices or rude behavior, I react with a lot of anger. I feel like throwing things when I’m angry. That’s why I don’t want to marry, I don’t like interference: after marriage life is hell, so I don’t want to marry.”

YM: tell me more?

P: “I can’t bear restrictions and fighting, I can’t take it. That’s why I am living separately from my family within the same house.”

YM: tell me more about this feeling.

P:  “It is like a supportive cover which protects you from outside world.”

YM: Be with it.

P: “It is like a baby in the womb, everything is there, there’s no stress, no disturbance; the mother protects that baby from everything.”

YM: Tell more about this cover.

P: pauses for a few minutes. “I can feel the cover. It is dark out there, there is heat, water, but there is peace, as I told you before, where nobody is there to disturb you. But I am not happy here.” She starts crying.

YM: Just relax, be with it and experience what is happening.

P: “I am feeling very angry and irritated. I’m crying but nobody is listening. Somebody is coming and disturbing me, he is spoiling my place. I am feeling very angry and hurt but I can’t do anything.”

YM: Be with it.

P: “My mother’s husband is coming into my space.”
She does not address him as her father, which is very strange.
“I told you, man is like a dog, he just wants his wish to be fulfilled. I hate men. But my mother is very bad, she must understand that this will hurt me, I feel very irritated but I can’t do anything. How can she do this to me? I am very sensitive, I feel pain, I don’t like my mother.” She cries a lot.

YM: What you are experiencing in this moment?

P: “Anger, very much anger, my body is trembling, I’m feeling very bad. Why didn’t she stop her husband? Very angry.” Cries a lot, she is constantly frowning.

YM: Tell something about your dreams?

P: “I often dream of our old house. I dream of being raped, ever since childhood.  At that age, I didn’t know about rape but still those dreams disturbed me a lot.

Sometimes, I dream of my mother getting raped by some people.”

YM: Tell me more about these dreams.

P: “When I saw my mother getting raped, I enjoyed that moment a lot, that she is getting all back.”

YM: Stay there.

P: (pause)

“It’s very scary, I can’t do it.”

YM: Be there, I am with you.

P: “This is very scary, there are too many people running behind me. I am trying to hide. They are all running behind me, they will kill me, I am very scared.” She cires.

YM: I am with you, stay there, what else is happening?

P: “I am feeling that right now, it is very scary, my body is trembling, I’m feeling angry as nobody is helping me out, they are all raising some slogans.”

YM: Stay there; you are doing very well.

P: “They saw me. Oh my God… I am running very fast, but they take hold of me…” She cries aloud for a few minutes.

YM: Ten minutes later:  What happened? Just tell me your experience.

P: “They catch me, raped me, burn me, it’s very painful. Man is an animal, a brutal animal, I hate him, he gives pain for his pleasure.  I hate my father, I hate men. Men are like mad dogs, they should be killed.”

YM: Tell me what you are experiencing right now?

P: “I feel like screaming, like breaking things. I want to hurt myself and others. Its burning, sweating, anger, my whole body is trembling. My voice is also trembling.

I am feeling very weak and drained.”

Then, I ask her to wait outside and I call her mother:

YM: Tell me about your state during pregnancy?

P: “That was not a happy time; I had frequent fights with my husband.”

She confirms that her husband forced her to sex during pregnancy, to which the patient referred as “he is spoiling my space.”

I called the patient into the consulting room again.

YM: Is there anything you want to add?

P: “No, I told you everything.”

YM: How is your experience of sharing all this with me?

P: “I’m very relaxed, at peace. For the first time, I understood everything I have experienced right from my childhood. Now, I can see very clearly.

That images of a city burning in flames, I can recognize that city, it is New Delhi from the 1984 Delhi riots.”

She again starts crying for some time, but her face is now relaxed.

Analysis

In the whole case, we can see her morbid sensitivity to her situation, to her family members; even her body is sensitive to food prepared by her mother. This case belongs to the Plant kingdom and the Ranunculaceae family. The experience in every situation is extreme anger, with trembling and with mixed emotions. There is rawness, rape, being burnt alive, extreme pain, anger, resentment towards her father and to men in general.

Rubrics

Mind, answers, slowly

Childish behavior

Homesickness

Indifference towards her family

Frown, disposition to

Mind, menses during agg

Prescription:  Helleborus 1M, three doses, hourly. Dose repeated every month for the first three months.

Follow ups

After one month: “I feel much better, more energetic and I’m now talking to my family, not a lot but better than before. I’ve had no fever in this month.”
Thyroid status remains unchanged.

After three months: “No fever, headache is very infrequent even if I do more exertion. The anger is much less, I’m happier than before. Now, there is no problem during menses: no anger or irritation during that phase and no pain. My thyroid levels are also improving.”

After six months

YM: What changes are you experiencing after the treatment?

P: “Dramatic changes, I am feeling happy, no dreams to disturb me, no stress, the atmosphere at home is very nice, I talk to my father, I stay with them and not alone  in a separate room like earlier.

“Now, I eat food prepared by my Mom and I can digest everything with no problem.

“I don’t feel the hatred that I previously felt for my father and men. I am in relationship and not single anymore.  I’m feeling happy.”

TSH is normal, all allopathic medicines are stopped.

After sixteen months: “Everything is fine, I am married. I’m very relaxed, no stress, I even remain calm in situations where I previously got out of control.”

What I learned from this case

Many times a patient gives various images that can confuse us, like in this case  where she talks about cover, protection, womb, her space, men are like dogs, rape, burnt alive, riot, etc., which may point towards various kingdoms. But finally, all these images, plus her other life situations, lead to one single, constant and persistent  experience, the feeling of extreme anger, trembling, rawness,  and that points to the kingdom, family and remedy.

This is what we call the timeless or present persistent and prominent experience and expression. It all came down to one remedy, Helleborus.  

It can be important to help someone to go through such a detailed journey rather than just prescribing on rubrics. When she was taken along the journey, she experienced everything that happened in her life, which in turn brought clarity about the things that bothered her. She knew why she had those dreams, why she hated men, why she hated her father and why food prepared by her mother brought her gastric symptoms.

Such a detailed interaction brings deeper awareness in patients about their inner disturbance and its connection to their experience with their life situations. This awareness has the potential to bring deep changes and happiness.

So, here we can say that the journey is the destination, the rest happens by itself.

Photo: Shutterstock
Woman crushing man; Catalin Petolea