Déjà vu and depression: a case of Ultrasound
MW, 14 years old, is very lean and tall for his age; with large, wide set eyes and large bone structure. He wears a knitted hat covering up his hair and ears which he keeps on for the entire two-hour initial visit. He comes with his mother who offers comments, but mostly he speaks for himself, though reluctantly.
MW: “The depression is not constant, it’s off and on; more a lack of motivation than actual sadness. I feel it like an internal frowning. A lot of things seem not worth doing, like they’re too complex – out of my reach.”
He was enrolled in an alternative high school after eight years in a Waldorf school. “It’s a disappointment. I’ve got no male friends; I’ve got one friend, a girl from my previous school who’s bright, too. I’m often not challenged and I feel alienated from the others. I used to be more social.”
Mother: “His bouncy side is gone, he’s not himself. His pregnancy was OK. I had a planned caesarian. His head
never engaged. It was the same circumstance as with his older brother. We had a
few ultrasounds. He had all the vaccinations, had chicken pox in first grade,
and was treated with antibiotics for quite a few ear infections. He weaned
himself at nine months.
When he was two and three he had incredible tantrums. It was like living with a land mine; he was constantly blowing up. He wasn’t talking and he did a lot of spinning, for which he was given occupational therapy.”
MW: “I’m hesitant at doing school activities. I want to make an efficient use of my time. I need to relax, to sit by myself. I can sit still in one position for long periods of time. I prefer that to being around people. My mind is very active; I’m always thinking. I’m smarter than my peers; things move slowly in my class. I spend a lot of time drawing and stippling with a sharpie; I make intricate black and white stippled drawings.” (Mom is a calligrapher).
“My eyes get sore from lights. I need silence after noise. Noise distracts me, that’s a real issue. Background noise makes it hard to hear. I hate the sound of feet tapping. My hearing’s very sensitive and discriminating. High heels make a certain sound that’s really irritating.”
At age eight M had major eye surgery for divergent strabismus, and had a difficult time coming out of anesthesia. He then had his baby teeth pulled involving more anesthesias which depressed his breathing. He panics with needles & IV’s after this.
MW: “I guess you could say I’m kind of a daredevil. I like
to climb to the tops of trees and sit there. I’m cautious climbing trees; I
like to be 50 feet up. I’m aware of where my weight is being distributed. I can
stop and chill out up there with no one around.
I like to meditate and look down at people and see how small they are. I do this most days after school.
I have psychic experiences from time to time; flashes of clarity where I get premonitions in words or vague images without emotions attached. Phrases pulled out of random conversation appear in my head.
About once a week I have déjà vu experiences, like seeing the moment of truth in an instant. I create this cycle of déjà vu; 2-3 cycles happening one after the other.
I enjoy creative writing without a prompt.
I don’t have an urge to be socially interactive.
I get motivation from inside myself.
I mostly just think. I think very scientifically. I want to understand how things work so that I can take what I’ve learned and apply it to real life. I’m aware of how I think, but it’s hard for me to translate those thoughts into words.”
Desire: cheese, pasta, plain grains, rice crispy cereal, meat. Aversion: spicy food. “My taste buds are sensitive. I have the same lunch every day – mustard, ham, cheese, sliced green apples, garden salsa with chips. Part of me likes change and part of me likes things to stay the same.”
Mom interjects, “Think of a ninety year-old man rocking on a porch.”
Physicals: pain in the center of lower back, flat feet and plantar fasciitis. Pulsating headaches. He has never had a head injury.
MW: “I’m not afraid of spiders but I’m afraid of killing
them. I used to have a strong fear of heights. In 4th grade, after
the surgery, I started climbing trees. My body temperature
runs warm. I can tell myself I’m not cold. I love to sprint on my bike but climbing trees is my sport. I’m a really bad runner. It seems the point of running is to
deplete all your energy.
My dreams are surreal but relate to something that happens to me, like a dream where all the teachers look the same. In 3rd grade, I dreamed of a glow in dark skeleton. I was meeting it under a street lamp. It was reaching out to me, lunged at me and attacked me.
Last summer I went to a friend’s camp for a two week sleep-away. I dropped being a middle-schooler. I have an intense process of separating from my younger self. I have a need for thinking deeper; I want to study to be a shaman. I have no fear of being judged. I didn’t relate to anybody in my grade. I experience alienation but I don’t shut people out.”
Assessement: M is very precocious, aware and intuitive beyond his years. I sensed that this was a remedy I had not encountered before, and was especially struck by his description of sitting in a tree and observing his world from a vantage point that no one else experiences. When I realized that this practice started after a surgery which altered his field of vision, and considered his stippled black and white drawings, it brought to mind the conical images of ultrasounds of my own children 30 years ago. His interest in shamanism and the control of his déjà vu experiences place him in the realm of the imponderables.
Prescription: Ultrasound 30c
2 months: M walks in smiling, hatless, and with a twinkle in his eye. No longer depressed, headaches, back and foot pain are gone. He has joined the science club and an art group at school and has branched out into other styles of drawing. He hasn’t been climbing trees as much since he’s spending more time with other kids who have similar interests. He even got up on stage at a student assembly to perform a trick, which he demonstrates for me. Lifting his shirt, he proceeds to very impressively roll the muscles of his belly, yogi-like, grinning from ear to ear.
February 2012: he has had no more déjà vu cycles since the remedy and is doing well in school. He is very different, with a feeling of being grounded and secure. The remedy was repeated once after 6 months when he had a disappointment, and has remained well for the last 18 months.
Nancy Frederick is the director of the Baylight School of homeopathy and practices in Portland ME, USA.
Photos: Wikimedia Commons
Cover Déjà Vu; Szabo Sorin
Foetus sonogram; Sam Pullara
Keywords: depression, déjà vu, headaches, foot pain, back pain